Jun 20, 2006

Wonderfully Made - Intrinsic Value

I remember all of the years that I spent thinking that something was wrong with me. You know, broken, warped, screwed up. I'm a mess. I believed that I needed to find the right combination of things so that suddenly I would be fixed.

All of that time I knew and intellectually believed the Bible when it says, ". . . I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." All human life is made by God, and for that reason is of value. God's creation should always be cherished, protected, enjoyed, and valued.

I kept seeing and sensing that I was different. Not just because I was goofy and had a weird sense of humor. I felt that there were distinct, but undependable differences between me and the typical world around me.

"If I'm so different", I thought, "that must be bad. Something about me is bad."

I look back on those days and feel sad. It makes me sad that I knew and believed the Bible, but couldn't experience the joy of being God's creation or the satisfaction of having been forgiven by God and considered His child. It all hinged on knowing that there was something "wrong" and not being able to figure out what it was.

Discovering Asperger syndrome was truly liberating for me. It lent logic and reason to who I was and gave me the missing piece to a life long puzzle. Nothing broken. Nothing wrong. I am who I was made to be, and that's o.k.

Discovering Asperger syndrome and growing to accept myself doesn't make the truth about God any more or less true. It was always true that God loves me, and that God made me for a reason and with a purpose in life. I just was not willing to accept it without more evidence or understanding.

These days I'm trying to learn from that experience. First, I want to learn somehow to accept what I believe to be truth from Bible at face value. It's hard when my personal circumstances don't back up what I believe. Every time in my life, God's Word (the Bible) has turned out to be true.

I also want to learn to see and understand the value in every person. Every person has been made by God. There is something of value in everyone.

Adam Parmenter

1 comment:

  1. Amen, brother. I couldn't have said it better myself. I love reading your writing... because it's almost as if it's my own subconscious talking to me, I relate so well to the things you say.